hi ho, hi ho, its off to work we go...

***note: this one's for my mother-in-law, who respectfully reminded me that a couple of posts back i stated i would write more about things on the job-front...and then didn't.***

i started this blog as we began preparing for our move to fort collins, almost one year ago (already?!). much of the blog has been dedicated to my job search...from the highs and lows of securing an interview only to end up disappointed, to wondering if i needed to switch gears altogether and try a different career field. i was so desperate i even contemplated going BACK to school for my doctorate. (as if i haven't accrued enough educational debt already.) and then...8 long and trying months later...success!!!

so my official title is FFT therapist, which means Functional Family Therapy/Therapist. FFT is a specific model of therapy that as an FFT therapist I must adhere to. it is a model that we studied in grad school, an evidence-based model which means it's been studied and critiqued by those in the field and has been proven to be successful with certain populations. in my case, the population is at-risk adolescents. my job is to do in-home family therapy with families of adolescents who are at risk of being removed from the home and placed either in residential treatment, a hospital, or a juvenile detention facility. basically i'm working to keep the families together. i go to court with families to support them through that process, to advocate for them in front of the magistrate and district attorney, and i coordinate with their probation officers or caseworkers so that we all are up to date on how the family is functioning. a full case load is 12 families, who i'm to see each week...sometimes multiple times a week depending on the families needs. because i'm doing therapy with the entire family, i have to work around the families schedule so that they can all participate, which means that frequently i don't start meeting with families until 3:30 pm or later. it's basically like working second shift. and here is where a lot of people groan...and i used to too. however, if you've known me a long time, you know that i'm not exactly a morning person. (and yes, i'm aware that this may be a slight understatement.) and this is something i've come to accept. i am more productive if i can have a slow start to the day, ease into it if you will. it has been an adjustment, but one that we're willing to make b/c for right now, it works for us. john is pretty busy working full-time and going to school part-time, so me being gone in the evenings allows him time to study. although i haven't officially started this yet, i plan to make lunch my big meal of the day, b/c by the time i get home (between 8/9), i'm really not up to cooking a full meal. i plan to cook something early in the day so that john can have it when he gets home so he's not scrounging around the pantry putting who knows what together as a meal. :)

at any rate, i'm starting to finally feel like we are not in limbo anymore. now that i'm working, there is more routine to things. (structure=good!!!!) i actually feel more organized, and am able to plan better. before, it was so easy to put things off because really, i had all the time in the world to clean or cook or empty the dishwasher and really, i got sick of that being the only thing i had to do. :)

for the most part, things are going really well. however, i will admit that this job can be pretty mentally exhausting. it takes a significant amount of effort to not take a family's problems with you, but sometimes you can't help but think about them when you're not on the job...wondering how they're going to make it through the week, if they're going to follow through on making a change we talked about, if they accepted how i attempted to change the meaning of a certain behavior, what my goals for the next session are. my co-worker said something to me today about it being nice when you're able to stop dreaming about them. so far...no dreams for me. but they're never far from my mind. each day is different, b/c i meet with different families every day. so while one day i might feel like the worst therapist there ever was, the next day a family reports a significant positive change since the last meeting. i wish i could give a specific example, b/c of confidentiality i can't. but there are moments in this work, that you really feel honored to be privy to a family's triumph. and those are the moments that make my 8 month struggle to find a job, worth it.